Insecurities

Last sem's modules were very much centred around foreign policies. This sem I'm going pretty ballistic into security studies. In fact, I felt it was a bit too extreme that I decided to drop asia-pacific security studies in the last minute and take up governance and politics of Singapore, which is afterall an essential module for PS undergrads. A quick check on the roster revealed that there is only one other honours student who will be joining me in the lecture.

I don't know why I have been getting a few waves of panic attacks; feeling rather insecure with my final thesis, the prospects of working after grad, of the possibility of getting scholarships, of doing post-grad studies, with the cell group, with the cluster, insecure about myself.

It is funny how I know so much about security as 'freedom from fear' in IR, but I have yet to understand what it means to have freedom from worries in my head.

Strum a few chords and sang a worship song just now. Maybe simplicity is the key to feeling secure.